My first time confessing ^_^; so take it easy on me please?
…Maybe this is selfish of me…but I do want an art friend, someone who is willing to push me as I am willing to push them. Someone who is willing to listen about my problems and help me correct them, to laugh with me, cry, jump scream….everything. I know I don’t deserve someone like this when I did have those friends and lost them because of a mistake I made. Ever since then I’ve been lonely, slowly repairing myself, but never the same. Since then I’ve spoken to friends about my problems…only a little so as not to overload them, and I’ve helped them here and there, and smiled to them when I really didn’t feel like smiling. Those very friends either have a relative or friend who does art with them, they inspire one another and feed of each other’s creativity, they laugh, they joke and the push at each other’s limit.
Maybe I am jealous, or I envy them. Is it bad to do so? I don’t even know.
I don’t have anyone like that at home, I’m the only who draws, though my family encourages me and compliment my art…I still feel lonely. I wish I could get up in the morning and feel excited to speak to that special friend, to tell them of my day and never get tired of their company. Why don’t I go find someone like that? Because I don’t know, I’m afraid of letting people see me? The me inside and get rejected. So easy for people to say and think…but it’s soo hard to do.
-submitted by cyan-wolf